Dracula could totally kick Edward Cullen’s Ass
Posted 1 year, 9 months ago at 4:59 pm. 9 comments
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I know I’m breaking from my usual titles, but I couldn’t think of a “Severe problem” to begin this one.
Okay, Dracula could beat the crap out of Edward Cullen. Cullen’s trapped in the body of a 17 year old, and Dracula has the body of a Wallachian Warrior Prince. Cullen’s been going to high school for 90 years, Dracula trained at the Scholomance.
Seriously, Dracula hits me as awesome. Cullen hits me as creepy and a pedophile (A 100-something guy should not even have thoughts about a 17 year old girl. I don’t care how young he looks).
And judging by all the adaptations of Dracula that have him coming back from from the dead, he’s like a Doctor Who villain. Dracula is never dead for good, there’s always some crazy-far-fetched way to bring Dracula back, but (as far as I know) Cullen’s never been killed and brought back.
Plus, Dracula’s powers are greater than any other Vampire’s, for one thing he’s had them longer, and for another, he became a vampire at the scholomance, rather than actually being bitten.
Plus, Cullen tries to be a good person and not harm other humans, whereas Dracula is ruthless enough to kidnap babies and feed them to his wives. Cullen would probably try to fight fair, whereas Dracula would play dirty.
Also, Dracula and Cullen both have relative super-strength and invulnerability, so Dracula’s strength could injure Cullen and Cullen’s could injure Dracula. In other words, their powers each cancel the other’s out, so it comes down to a battle of physical strength, and since Dracula’s had his super-strength since the 15th century, so he would have better mastery of it.
Sorry Cullenites, Dracula wins.
Haha, P5, funneh. XD
I remember seeing this in the Debate forum on FG.
Dracula is such a freak! Edward is awesome! dracula cant do anything to him! he cant even come out in broad daylight for gods sake!I mean, stick thin, weedy transylvanian dork, hello!Ugh.
Let me counter your reply:
First, Edward being “awesome” does not contribute to skill in fighting. At all. Mr. David Tennant, he’s awesome, but probably wouldn’t fare well in a fight.
Second, he was never described as “Stick Thin,” he was described as tall and thin, but also extremely strong. As I recall, Edward Cullen also fits this description, am I wrong? Also, I have no idea what you could possibly mean by “Weedy,” but I assure you, Dracula is not involved with Weed.
Third, Dracula can go out in Broad Daylight. He just can’t shapeshift as quickly. Cullen can’t shapeshift in the daylight either, or at all, ever for that matter. Here’s a list of powers Dracula has that Cullen shares:
-Superstrength
-Superspeed
-Ability to read minds
And here’s a list of powers that Dracula has that Cullen doesn’t:
-Ability to command animals
-Ability to command the dead
-Shapeshifting
-Mind Control
Not to mention the fact that while Cullen’s powers wear out the longer he has them, Dracula’s powers get stronger the longer he has them. Cullen has had his power for 90 years, so his powers are 90 years weaker than when he got them. Dracula’s had his powers for over 500 years, so his powers are 500 years stronger.
Plus, I disagree with your “Edward is Awesome” statement. Edward is the biggest creeper on the Young Adult shelf at Barnes and Noble. He’s obsessed with a girl to the point of stalking her (following her and her friends on a dress-shopping trip without her knowledge or consent is stalking) just because he can’t creep around in her head is extremely creepy. Also, a Hundred-something year old man dating a teenage girl is totally wrong no matter how you spin it. Edward Cullen is a stalker and a pedophile. He doesn’t deserve the admiration he gets.
I wonder why you used a different name for your other post?
The rest of the post will feature a list of powers Edward has that Dracula doesn’t:
…
You have an excellent writing style, and terrific spelling. I adore you. I shall, for now on, be reading every post you make.
Sincerely,
Kya
Hip hip hooray for P5 !!!
I dunno what happen to this grandpa Cullen’s head, but…
finally in love after 100-something years of his life… and to a teenager’s so wrong.
oh, and one more thing…
Robert Pattison is a big NO, No.
what, like there’s no more better guy out there???
Let’s also share the point here that whilst Edward the pretty boy on the block, Dracula, was noted as being a rather formiddable warrior, Vlad the Impaler.
Vlad Dracul, was a warriors warrior, a man not to be beaten. Edward, was more used to beating off men…
The Count Can turn into Gas.
How awesome is that?
Some people have stated that his Combat prowess would not be equal to Edwards, but yes! He’s ACTUALLY trained for it!
It took the Genius of HELSING and his allies to find and battle him. Mein Gott, the Count is just too awesome to be beaten!
Some of these have had people that belive the Count unable to Combat, but as You have above stated, he quite Clearly Can!
Count DRACULA has the power of his mind. He Can Control people!
It has even been noted that only Bella has any form of mental shield…
Plus. His Countship Can turn into Gas.
How awesome is that?
A Vampire so Great that his Fans dubbed him the Lord of Vampires, versus Cullen who eats his wifes uterus.
…
Yeah.
Go Count Go!
yourajerk! -
) – somebody (in this case Edward Cullen) with the intelligence, experience and maturity of Edward’s age never belongs with someone like Bella. It’s just freaky.
Most of the Cullen drool is because of the actors. Seriously. Robert Patterson = Hot. That is undeniable. BUT as it is very neatly explained in the book “Brisingr” By Christopher Paolini (it might have been “Eldest”- Not sure
Back to the point of the post!
Dracula would kick Cullen’s sparkly ass and then move on to Bella. And kill her too. The character of Dracula was made to be (cool) unbeatable. Edward’s….. Was meant to be a “hot” vampire who loves some chick. Y’a see the difference?